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Page 2 obtains secret promotions schedule
By Darren Rovell
Page 2 columnist

Now that baseball season has started and our thoughts are turning to sunnier times, Page 2 decided to let you in on some of the lesser-known Major League promotions scheduled for this year. So circle these dates on your calendar, and start planning your vacations.

Atlanta Braves -- John Rocker Apology Night
(April 12 at New York Mets)


	Fans might jump at the chance to show Albert Belle some mean and surly behavior.

Braves reliever John Rocker will finally offer the formal apology that New Yorkers have been screaming for. The first 10,000 fans will get autographed posters of Rocker and friends on the No. 7 train in New York. Rocker will sing The National Anthem with the surviving members of the Village People.

Arizona Diamondbacks -- Diamondbacks
General Fund Night
(April 20 vs. Colorado)
First, Arizonans paid for the stadium. Now, if they don't want to lose the team, they'll have to help the Diamondbacks with their payroll. So managing general partner Jerry Colangelo will go seat-to-seat around the entire park, hat in hand, asking for donations. Just another example of baseball trying to get fans more involved in the game. Colangelo might even lobby to get fans tax deductions because the D-Backs are certainly a nonprofit group.

Boston Red Sox -- Ownership Threatens
to Leave Fenway Again Night
(May 28 vs. New York Yankees)
For the past couple years, Red Sox CEO John Harrington has been threatening to leave old Fenway Park because limited revenue streams from the aging ballpark are insufficient to allow the team to compete with its rich rivals -- New York and Baltimore -- in the American League East. This despite the fact that the team, mysteriously enough, can afford Pedro Martinez and Manny "$160 Million Man" Ramirez. Harrington will give his favorite "We can't compete in this hellhole" speech for the final time, as new ownership is set to take over by next season.

Los Angeles Dodgers -- Scott Boras
Bobblehead Doll Night
(June 12 vs. Texas)
That's right, the first 15,000 Boras Haters get their chance to pick up what is sure to be a very popular and valuable collectors' item -- the Scott Boras Bobblehead Doll, which comes complete with fake money in one hand and a contract in the other, and is durable enough to take a thorough beating. Boras will likely have at least four clients playing in this game, including an all-Boras faceoff between one of Boras' four starters on the Dodgers pitching staff -- Kevin Brown, Chan Ho Park, Darren Dreifort, Eric Gagne -- and Alex Rodriguez.

Baltimore Orioles -- Albert Belle Depreciation Day
(June 23 vs. Chicago)
Long-suffering followers of the hapless O's will enjoy a pregame ceremony in which the team will trick Albert Belle into thinking they are retiring his jersey. Security will detain Belle near the pitcher's mound as 500 lucky fans get to take their best shots with their free Orioles logo baseballs. White Sox and Indians fans are also encouraged to attend -- and even join in -- this unique event!

Florida Marlins & Montreal Expos --
Suggest Our Next City Night
(June 26)
A chance to participate in Fantasy History. Vote on which cities you think would be perfect relocation spots for the Florida Marlins and the Montreal Expos, as the two play each other at Pro Player Stadium. Or should the two teams be disbanded? Which should go to Washington, D.C., and which to Memphis? Major League Baseball Commissioner Bud Selig will announce the results during the seventh-inning stretch.

Minnesota Twins -- Try Out for Right Field Night
(July 6 vs. Reds)
The first 100 fans to enter the Metrodome will try out in front of longtime manager Tom Kelly. One lucky -- and, hopefully, skilled -- fan will then start in right field in a real major league game. The fan will go home with at least the lineup card and -- if things really work out well -- might be signed immediately after the game.

New York Yankees -- Piazza and Clemens
Steel Cage Day
(July 6 vs. New York Mets)
There are no plans for Clemens and Piazza to make up, and the New York teams figure they may as well capitalize on it. No balls, no bats, just plain Mikey and Roger going at it in a steel cage in the infield at Yankee Stadium. George Steinbrenner will present a check for $1 million to the blood-covered winner, Vince McMahon will produce a pay-per-view for those who can't obtain the much-prized tickets, and the first 5,000 fans under 12 to arrive will receive free Mike Piazza Beaned Babies.

St. Louis Cardinals -- Rick Ankiel First Pitch Night
(Aug. 2 vs. Atlanta)


	Memorabilia collectors are just wild about Rick Ankiel.

Watch intently as Rick Ankiel comes in from the bullpen at the start of the game to the tune of "Wild Thing" and will attempt to throw out the very first pitch accurately to Cards' catcher Mike Matheny -- almost 10 months to the day after his five wild pitch performance against the Braves last year. Predict exactly where the pitch will hit the wall behind Matheny and win a T-shirt that reads, "I survived an at-bat against Rick Ankiel."

Montreal Expos -- Sit in Every Seat in Olympic Stadium Night
(Sept. 6 vs. Philadelphia)
For this game against the Phillies, you and your friends can say you've sat in every seat in Olympic Stadium! Start in the first inning and try all 43,739 seats. Don't worry. Nobody will be sitting in any of them.

Darren Rovell, who has almost every promotional that the New York Mets gave out from 1985-2000, is ESPN.com's sports business reporter and can be reached at darren.rovell@espn.com.

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