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Being ... Kobe Bryant

Special to Page 2


For a 22-year-old, Kobe Bryant has a lot going on inside his head. Should I play in the All-Star Game? How long can I coexist with Shaq? DJ or live band at the wedding? Page 2 delves deep inside the kid's mind.

The only thing wrong with playing alongside the greatest basketball players in the world during the All-Star Game is having to occasionally pass the ball to them.

To understand how one of the NBA's greatest players is handling that pressure this weekend, join us on a stroll through Kobe Bryant's brain with your mouse:

Controls sight and hearing

Occasional nerve synapses in otherwise exceptional senses cause him to not see or hear 7-foot-2 objects that are wide open underneath the basket.

Short-term memory center

To-do list: Get ankle and elbow taped. Score 40 points. Pick up wife after sixth period geometry class. Have 20 broccoli pizzas delivered to Shaq's house.


Controls basic needs

Gimmeetheball. Gimmeetheball. Gimmeetheball. Gimmeetheball. Gimmeetheball. Gimmeetheball. Gimmeetheball.

Center for mathematical reasoning

If Player A takes 50 shots a game and sinks 58.4 percent, and also shoots 85 percent from the line, and Player B takes only 20 shots a game and shoots 50 percent from the line, who will be the MVP?


Controls sexual urges

Hubba-hubba. Too bad she's a little old.


Long-term memory center

Remember to call Shaq after the All-Star Game and ask him if his refrigerator is running.































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ALSO SEE:
Being Vince McMahon

Being Art Modell

Being Jason Sehorn

Being Dick Vermeil





 
    
 
 
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