(Editor's note: Oregon State sophomore running back Ken Simonton will share a weekly diary with ESPN.com throughout the season. For more information on the Beavers, visit the official OSU site.)

Oct. 20, 1999

Last week, in a 21-17 loss to Stanford, I was stopped on fourth-and-goal from the Cardinal 1. I should have scored. If I would have made the right read, I would have scored. I didn't need to make a cut to the left.

	THE FULL DOSE OF DIARIES
	Miami's André King: A different kind of Hurricane
	UCLA's Danny Farmer: Credit the Cal defense
	USC's Travis Claridge: Time to put up or shut up
	Oregon's Reuben Droughns: Getting his groove back
	Oklahoma coach Bob Stoops: Consistency is the key

Unfortunately, in the same game, I also fumbled the ball away twice near the goal line. I never want to beat myself up too much, so I'm pretty much over it. I did carry it with me on Sunday, but by Monday I have to let it go and move on. I have other things to do at the start of the week, like concentrating on school, and I can't afford to dwell on things I can't change.

This week we host UCLA, and from here on, every game is big. It's nice to get back home and I hope the fans can help get us back on the right track.

The team is excited about the prospects of me gaining 1,000 yards (Simonton has 905 yards through six games this season) -- that is a measure of a good running team. The yards are great, but winning games is the most important.

Although we've lost three straight games, it's unfair to look at one or two guys for leadership right now, you have to look at yourself and each other. We're in this together, as a team, and it would be totally unfair to point fingers. We have to rally around each other and stay confident in what we are trying to achieve.

Personally, I felt a little banged up Saturday, but after being off for a full day and taking ice baths, I feel pretty healthy now. The (dislocated) thumb is a little stiff, but it doesn't hurt.

My thumb does bother me though, because it makes me think about it. A running back can't afford to be thinking about things other than playing hard. There were some situations where I should have had the ball in my left hand, but due to the injury, I had to keep it in my right. A couple of times it was the wrong situation to have the ball in my right hand. It's not so much the pain I have in my thumb, it's just the thinking about it -- 'the do I switch the ball over' thinking process, rather than just reacting.